The Collegian

Issue date: 9/9/05 Section: Opinion

Jonathan Gilbert and Angie Maldonado gaze into each other eyes in the fairly new apartment in Lodi.

Marriage is sacred; it is beautiful and it is a lifetime commitment. Yes, while marriage can be a fabulous decision, it can also be a life shattering mistake, right? Not this time.

Many people believe that young love is just that; immature, uncertain, under-developed emotions that stir participants into blind and reckless behavior. This would be an example of generalizing and stereotyping, neither of which reflect one's ability for rational thought while in love.

At some point we've all known someone to say, "life is not fair and nothing is for certain." So why does everyone (and I do mean everyone, adults are not the only skeptics) break into hysterics when a young couple announces their engagement? If nothing is for sure, then how can these pessimists be certain that a marriage will fail based solely on the

age of the bride and groom?

Honestly, many people do not automatically consider the couple's personalities and/or maturity levels when they sentence them to a one-way trip to splitsville. Usually judgements are quickly passed and no hope is given to the happy couple.

Yet Alaric Overbey, age 32, firmly believes marriages and their potential longevity must be looked at on an individual basis.

"Nobody, not even the people themselves, are going to be able to say whether or not it's going to work out," said Overbey. "The only thing [couple's] can do is put their best effort into making the relationship work."

All relationships require compromise and understanding. What may work

in a truly young couple's favor is having a few common goals as they approach married life. This simple but important similarity may be what makes all the difference during the first five years, which are typically the most difficult.

Let us also not forget that pre-marital counseling does exist and is out there for all who seek to find it.

What tends to be the most tro bling to adults and even most college students when they hear of a young engagement, is the notion that one's young life will be "all over" once they tie the knot. As if to say that one aspires to do nothing more than get married and start a family ASAP.

"I want to become a RN and work in the OB department," said Delta college freshman Angela Maldonado, of her current and future plans. She and her finace, Jonathan Gilbert, plan to wed in May of next year.

After dating for over three years, Gilbert is confident his marriage will last, regardless of the fact that he is 19 and his future wife, 17.

"We are best friends and can tell each other anything," said Gilbert.

Communication really is the key in any relationship, but perhaps it is most important when dealing with a marriage.

In an online article from The College Dispatch, author Whitney Carroll reported that "[i]n November 2004, MNBC reported a 17 percent increase in young marriages in the UnitedStates."

With so many young people in favor of getting married, let's hope they can all give the matter all the attention and consideration it deserves before completing the act.

Believe it or not, some people find true love at a young age, and if they want "happily ever after" to begin as soon as possible, well that's their own business.

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